Femdom Blog

Cheating, lying, bastard slave.  I followed the asshole today, having to see where he goes when he leaves my condo because something hasn’t been right the last day and half.  Last time I weighed my live-in slave on the 26th he was 87 kg, just four away from the goal I told him he would reach by being my submissive bitch for the month, and then suddenly just two days later he weighs in at 88.2 kg earlier this morning.  As I told you, this being the last week of his weight loss domination I’ve rationed his meals down to 2 mangoes and however much rice he wants to allot himself over these last 3 days which is about a cup full.  You don’t go up a full kg eating just enough to survive.

So I told him I was going out for a hotel session today at 1pm while actually I went down to the pool and moved the suntanning chair right to the edge of the small wall where I could look down at the lobby area to see people coming and going from my condo.  Sure enough, no more than 30 minutes later he left wearing his red shorts and black t-shirt and get this , my heart was pumping thinking I’d lose him in the time it took me to get down to the first floor , so much so that I began sweating in the elevator going down.  But it turned out fine, I got to the street and after really fast walking … even faster than I normally walk which is wickedly fast I caught up to him a minute later but stayed well enough behind him to see where he was going.

I’ve got his wallet, his passport, his credit card, his atm cards all in my safety deposit box, and out of the 500 I gave him at the beginning of the month he’s now down to his last 37 baht which has to last him until the 29th.  So there’s no way the guy has money, unless he was going to Villa supermarket to get a pack of Mama soup , but even that is 48 baht, more than he has.  He walked right past Villa though and when he got to the top of soi 11 he went right passing under Nana skytrain station.  It occurred to me that he was walking with direction, like he had a destination in mind, because it’s a good 12 minute walk at his slow pace from my condo to the top of the soi, and another 5 minutes along Sukhumvit the way he was heading.

We’re talking about a guy who’s been living on 1000 calories a day at most, without a trace of sugar except for the jam which is the only thing left in the fridge now that is sweet.  So i’d hardly make it to the washroom if I was starved like that, let alone go for a 20 minute stroll through Bangkok.

Jaa's McDonald Bitch

So this guy, he goes into the McDonald’s that’s at the corner of Soi 5 and for a minute I didn’t know what to do because he’d obviously see me if I followed him in.  However there was an outdoor chair available and i turned it so it was facing the street more or less giving him a view of the back of my head if he cared to look over at me.  I felt like when I was a girl climbing over the chairs to peek over the top when my mom used to take me long time ago.

He didn’t go to the line up to order, he just sat down on the far side of the place with his back to the wall look directly over in my direction which is why i had to duck and sneak peaks every minute.  I thought he was meeting somebody.  I guessed that he had contacted a friend and this was the meeting place.  My phone is fingerprint password protected though so he didn’t call with mine, his is in my deposit box, so what the hell?  How is he calling?  Did he use some of the 500 baht for an emergency call?  Ok, but that still doesn’t explain how he went up 1kg in 48 hours instead of down.

Thirty minutes he just sat there, and it was mid afternoon with the sun and few clouds so I was getting hot, pissed off, mad.  Mostly I was getting tired of looking back and spying on him because he wasn’t doing anything until, well until he stood up and walked right to the window to my left on this side of the store.  I got that heart pounding again because I thought he had seen me, he walked directly towards the door in front of where I was sitting.  But then he sat down where two fat muslim chicks had just been sitting and you know what the fucker did?

He started eating the french fries they had left behind and the last bite of one of the cheeseburgers they left as well.  I had to smile, I mean not because what he did to scavenge food was brilliant, but because his month with me had reduced him to this, eating other people’s leftovers.  I not saying I had an evil smile, I’m saying that one of the things I wanted to teach him when all this started which was to have a deeper respect for food was apparently clear to him now.  I want the guy to reset his whole lifestyle, his whole outlook on life and the reason we are on this planet, and there’s nothing like the humbleness of starvation to do that.

jaa4uAny hi-so guy can go on a starvation diet.  What I’ve added to his diet is a desperation.  By sitting in McDonalds eating other people’s scraps, he learned that he has a survival gear I bet he never knew he had.  One that millions of us Thai’s have forcefully had to develop at a much much earlier age.  It’s what separates us from you, it’s just not possible for you to relate to somebody fully if you’ve never gone years without worrying where food will come from.

As much as I felt sorry for the guy though, the fact is that he broke the rules of our contract.  There’s no clause that says he can’t go eat leftovers, I didn’t plan for that honestly, it’s my first time taking somebody into water this deep.  However since he initially came to me for a Weight Loss domination program, i’d say he clearly stepped over the line of what I’d allow and for that he needed to be punished.

Beside the McDonald’s there’s a whole lot of small shops and I went looking for a coat hanger or something cheap I could use to smack this guys ass and I settled on a wooden cooking spoon.  Bursting through the door to his right he looked up with the look of a 6 year old kid with his hand caught in the cookie jar.

“I’m sorry mistress” he mumbled with his mouth full of fries that he had stuffed in his mouth as soon as he saw me.  His hands raised to his chin in the “I surrender” pose.

“Up, get up.” I said.  Walking around to his back side I lashed him 10 times with the spoon on his ass pausing to make him count each stroke.  I don’t go to McDonalds ever so personally I didn’t give a fuck that everybody was watching, I’ll never see them again anyways.  However I did want to get out of there before the UPS wannabe guys in brown came around, just takes a phone call.  So I grabbed him by his ear and dragged him outside, put him on the motorcycle taxi waiting across the street and sent him home paying the taxi guy in advance.

“When I get home I want to see you on your knees in front of the toilet, no excuses.” I told him sternly.

One way to guarantee me to shit is to eat shit, so I went not to McDonald’s but to the Burger King down the street on the other side of Nana intersection to order one of their burgers.  Disgusting, I nearly vomited eating it and left half of it on the tray.  How the hell people eat crap like that?  Even in New Zealand I never gave in to fast food even though it was all around me and hardly any Thai food to eat in its place.

Thirty minutes later I get home, my stomach ready to erupt suddenly.

Dude was on his knees like I told him to do but as soon as I walked into the bathroom he starts crying out “please mistress I’m sorry, I don’t want to eat your shit, I don’t want it, please I can’t.”  He says that over and over like a 4 year old, even pausing to make the sobbing sound kids do when they cry too hard.  You know, I’ve had this question floating in my head for a long long time, asking myself can I as a mistress still respect a guy fully after he’s eaten my shit?  With the way this guy was reduced to nothing more than blubbering ooze on the floor before me without even having smelled my ass let alone taste my shit, I’d say the answer to my question is a big fat no.

“You’re not, watch me shit instead, if you want to eat i’ll leave it in the toilet for you.”

Not exactly my dream of having a guy eat from my ass like it’s ice cream, a hope that I had for this guy as early as yesterday but my fantasy will have to wait I guess.  Still, no more goddamn mangoes for this guy in the morning.  Tomorrow is the 28th, essentially the last day of our contract as I have to release him if he wants on the 29th.  He can go a day with his rice, he has enough for a morning cup and an evening cup if he spreads it out.  I’ll leave enough water in the fridge and he’s hardly touched his lime juice so I’m thinking he won’t pass out on me.

human toilet training jaa4uBut I’m going to make it awfully tempting to fish my Whopper out of the toilet water in the next 24 hours.  I told him so too.  I took his head when I was done and by his hair I forced his face down so his lips were touching my poo filled water in the toilet.

“You like fast food lor?  Ok there’s your Whopper, fucking eat it when you’re hungry enough.  Then get the fuck out on the 29th, I have no time for cheaters looking for a way to zig zag out of their problems.”

“Please mistress, don’t do that, I’m sorry.  I’ll do anything.”

What?  I forgot what I wrote in my last blog, that I really believe as hard as I have been on him for the whole month he will elect to not leave tomorrow.  Well day after tomorrow, it’s 1am on the 28th as I write this.

This guy might actually stay.  Have I broken him?

I’ve given him since day 1 a journal to write in which I thought might help fill the time since my condo has no internet or cable.  Ah I lie, it does now.  They came to put the internet in early this morning with the cable guy coming on Monday so if this dude does decide to stay I doubt he’ll write anything if he has at all until now.  I might have to restrict his tv , i don’t know.  Fuck, I’m drifting, sorry.  It’s late, i’m tired.  I did a 3 hour session beside the old airport today that took 6 hours out of my day, most of it stuck in a taxi.  Hate that.

So so, hell, this guy might be broken.  I’ve really been looking for a guy who serves because he needs to, not because he enjoys it, but rather because it’s his duty.  I think with this huge experiment I might be able to extract such behavior from this dude, if he elects to stay.

If he does, I’ll make sure he learns what “I’ll do anything” really means.


jaa xx


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